Saturday, May 27, 2006


Milena, Rada, ME!
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ME & Marisa
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ME, Dee & Be
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Friday, May 26, 2006

The Stills concert was excellent!
All of you totally missed out! lol

Except for Marisa and I:
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I think I will go see them when they come back to town again :) You will just have to come with me then and see for yourself. Here are just a few pics from a camera I borrowed from work:

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Friday, May 05, 2006

CONGRATULATIONS to Hannelle and Jon on their engagement!!!

Now both of my housemates are engaged :)
I am so full of joy for each of you :)

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Breathe Deep
The trees are in bloom...

Currently dying my hair black :)
It is shorter too

something new
**Singing**: “Here Comes the Rain Again and, it’s alright! It’s alright!”

It was a beautiful morning’s walk to work and it looks like it is going to THUNDERSTORM!!! YAY!!! I wish I could go dance in the rain, but alas,I admit and though I am greatful: I am at work… And though my coworkers would enviously watch me as I skit about, lavishly soaking in the cool wet droplets plattering (I just made up that word) against me, I don’t think it would be wise…

Lately I have been “off” It could be a combination of this darn tonsillitis that has been restricting me to sing and what Cher would call “riding the red wave” AND feeling a wee bit lonely with a lack of energy and a tad of frustration over resulting laziness. Ingredients for stagnation I tell you!

So, I have put post-its (I LOVE POST-ITS) on my wall (one day I’m sure I will come home to find that I have actually wallpapered my wall with post-its completely, I like them so much) of goals for the week including: going running out in this gorgeous weather, taking pictures with all the new filters and film I bought for my sweet manual camera, finishing books I’ve started and doing art etc etc. Hopefully I feel accomplished soon, lol. I really need to finish University….

I’ve been a little confused this past year: About what I believe anymore, about what Truth is. I’ve talked with some people who have been willing to listen and challenge me, I’ve read some here and there. I’ve been told that some do not value Truth and do not search for it as I do. I have gotten the impression that Truth is subjective, that extreme belief is close in-line with mental instability. I’m stuck in between the faith that keeps us sane and the reasoning mind that makes us question. Faith has never been an issue for me before, but these days my faith is a wee bit burnt out and I resort to simply enjoy my existence, make things happen as I can and let the rest fall into God’s hands. I have open eyes to see what I can see, I have an open mind to consider what is to be considered, I have a hand hesitant to hold onto anything and yet I often find it holds onto too much. I am resorting to let go of some things, it is very painful, my whole body and mind resists it. At the same time I realize I have let go of other things without realizing, because I have been caught up in every day and have not set aside time for them, this I regret. The other day I went through my msn and deleted people. I have not done that for years, or ever, but I felt I needed to move on, start anew; cut off shriveled branches, sprout new ones that actually have potential to bear any fruit.
But, you know what? It’s natural to desire to be a part of things, to be going somewhere, to have people to love you who you love. So, while I have done this, it does not mean I throw away the cut off parts for good, they are still a part of what I have become, they will be put into compost instead. Because, I do not shun them, I am glad they were part of my life, and if they came along I would embrace that and welcome them without expecting anything.
I do not expect anything.

If this sounds depressing, I’m sorry for you. It’s not. It’s peace.

I wonder in the confusion, have I lost myself? What do I think? Why can’t I assert myself? And yet I am assertive in my own way. It’s just not on little everyday things that are annoying to most people, or on major topics that people would go picket about. It’s on a more universal and yet personal scale, and I can only hope that others can find it too.
On a lighter note, I come to find where I feel most myself these days: When I am out walking, when I am in the gorgeous country, when I sip tea quietly wrapped up in a blanket when it rains outside, or in the sun-kissed summer evenings; when beautiful nostalgia mixes with the present, and I can be myself with whoever is near.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

What if every piece that needed to be attatched was attatched with velcro?
When you go to answer the phone: rrrrip
What if every surface was velcro? every page you turn would sound like a rrrrip
And what if the ground looked like astro turf? and whenever you walked it went rrip rrip rrip....
We would become used to that noise I suppose.
My dog likes that noise.

Some middle-aged man said I had nice lips today
I suppose that is sweet

I am very random and somewhat depressed and quiet today.
Perhaps I need a vacation...
monotany is setting in